The World's Largest Rattlesnake Round-Up

"Say hi to Charlie," said the concessionaire as he pushed a stuffed, roughly 5-foot-long rattlesnake in my face.

If there is one creature on this planet that I cannot handle, in any shape or form, its the snake.

In this case, it is the Western Diamondback Rattlesnake, specifically.

For 52 years now, Sweetwater, Texas has hosted its annual Rattlesnake Round-Up, originally dreamt up by a group of ranchers with the desire to annihilate the large rattlesnake population in the area. Tired of their cattle getting bitten, the Round-Up allowed for the capture, data gathering, venom leaching, skinning and--eventual--murder and consumption of said snakes.

Today, the yearly event boasts its own 'parade' (and I use that term loosely), Miss Snake Charmer Competition (requiring the competitors to skin a snake) and a weekend-full of disgustingly fatty foods being consumed by complete and utter rednecks.

So I had to go.

With my sister and nephew in town, the timing couldn't have been better. Admittedly, I did attend the event back in 2007--my first Spring in the area--to say that I had. I vowed, at that moment, to never return.

But, again, how could I pass up the opportunity to scar my sister for life?


Trying to remain calm and be decent to the concessionaire (who we wanted to punch), we laughed nervously and walked on, zig-zagging through a surprisingly large crowd of onlookers. Cheap, yet over-priced, gifts filled the area; gifts of all sorts. Rattlesnake skins, rattlesnake heads, t-shirts, picture frames, hats and even Kevlar chaps (to avoid being bitten). It was a hillbilly heaven.

Less than impressed, my sister couldn't hide her disgust, questioning why such a large crowd was gathering around the 'skinning pit'.

"Do they skin them alive?" she asked, fear in her eyes.

I couldn't answer the inquiry, but assumed that it couldn't be true.

We never ventured over to look.

I hardly think we lasted 30 minutes in the Round-Up arena. Other than watch fools trample around in snake pits, watch other fools catch and de-venom (is this a word?) poor victims or gawk at the oh-so-interesting crowd, there isn't much to do.

Except shutter.

Rumor has it that each year several of the captured escape the wrath....

...that they are later 'found' wandering around the arena grounds, or in the park...

...but with each coming spring the hunters will be out again, searching for that prized snake--the one that could win them the coveted 'largest snake' award...

...and the crowds will reassemble to eat snake, fried cream cheese sticks and over-sized burritos.

Welcome to West Texas.